If you haven’t yet, please start off by reading the With You Matchmaking Community Guidelines here!
Who is on the list?
Right now the list is almost entirely referral based. I ask that you only refer people to my list who you feel are safe and trusted.
There are ~320 people on the list, most people are in the Greater Boston area and I have a very small number of people in NYC, LA, and DC (and a few beyond those locations as well). If you are not in the Boston area, you are welcome to join my list but please know that matches may take more time and happen with significantly lower frequency. Most people on my list are in their 20s and 30s, with very few people above that age range (though I’d love to expand the age range over time). By agreeing to a match, you (and anyone I match you with) agrees to follow these community guidelines. I also have these resources available for all who are on the list.
The list is currently multi-racial and multi-ethnic with a large percentage of people being Jewish, but that is evolving as more people get connected to my work. Many people on my list are queer. In my experience, many people on this list share progressive values.
I have regular calls with matchmakers in New York and Chicago – and we provide each other support with our work. If you are interested in joining their lists, please let me know and I can connect you.
How much does it cost?
To keep my work financially accessible I operate using a community-supported model. Read more here and become a community member of With You Matchmaking here ($36-$144/ a year). Becoming a member makes my matchmaking work possible! This membership is not required in order to join my list.
To join my list, sign up for the intake waitlist here, the fee for an intake is a sliding scale of $54-$144, learn more here, and if this range is not possible for you I can absolutely be flexible.
How do I join the list?
Sign up for the waitlist here. Right now there are very few openings for new people to join the list. Every month or so I will send out my available intakes for signing up. Because I do this work part-time (1-day a week), the process is often slow.
I only work with clients directly. I am happy to have clients be referred by parents, family, or friends but I communicate directly with you about who you are and what you are looking for.
What happens once I join the list?
I am a low-touch community matchmaker. Rather than charging thousands of dollars to a small number of clients to work with each of them intensively, I am able to charge lower rates to a large number of clients, but offer a less intensive service. I often say I typically offer people between 0-5 match ideas per year (most commonly 2-3 per year), but there is a wide range based on identities and what you are looking for.
Once you respond to my emailed intro questions the process begins. If you want me to get to know you better as I match you, you can set up a call with me. I recommend this call for anyone joining my list, and especially for people who I do not have personal connections with. And for people who come to me entirely unreferred, I require this call. Here are the details of the call.
Then:
- If I have a potential match for you, I will send you their bio and photo(s).
- If you are not interested in the match, no problem, just let me know.
- If you are interested in the match and the other person is not, I will let you know and keep looking for you.
- If you and the other person are both interested in a match, I will connect you both via text, and let you two take it from there and schedule a date.
- After connecting with the person, it is extremely important to send feedback to me via email, about the match! This is how I can keep track of matches and better understand what you are looking for!
If I send you a potential match and I don’t hear back from you after 7-10 days, I will gently ping you. If you do not respond after the reminder, I will assume you are not interested in the match.
Your profile is only seen by the potential matches I share your profile with (which typically is one or two matches at a time).
What is your perspective on matchmaking and how do you make matches?
My perspective on matchmaking is that you are the expert on you. Follow your instincts and your internal yes’s and no’s, and go at your own pace. I trust you and will always follow your lead. As your matchmaker, I am committed to endless hope on your behalf. I truly believe that everyone is moments away from finding what they are looking for. I can promise you that once you are on my list, you will never be forgotten.
My list used to be all people I knew personally, but now that it has grown I often make matches based on what people share about who they are and what they’re looking for. I will be candid with you about my personal relationships (for example: if I know someone personally and can vouch for them or if I do not know them personally.) I generally do not set people up with every person they have basic alignment with, but rather I’m looking for matches that feel right to me, often in light of the sense I get of the people, and their understanding and relationship with themself.
Can I start working as a matchmaker as a part of With You Matchmaking?
Unfortunately, I do not have capacity to bring anyone else into With You Matchmaking as an additional matchmaker. I absolutely encourage everyone and anyone who has a knack for matchmaking to start their own project/business as a matchmaker though!
If you’d like to meet with me to discuss your ideas for starting a matchmaking business, please consider paying on the same sliding scale as others do for an intake – just due to my extremely limited matchmaking time. Thank you!
With You Matchmaking 